Allow us. You are to blame. Now that we have that out of the way, take a seat. It is time to have that talk.

Ever wondered why you catch your crushes attention, but he never makes the move?

Before we dive in too deep, let’s get back to the basics. Make-up, a noun:  meaning cosmetics applied to the face to improve or change your appearance.

You are beautiful – let us get that one clear. So you don’t need to change your appearance. That’s the part the men hate. Lady, unless you are in a goth movie and needed your vamp look to pull off the part, there is no reason to pack it on that way.

Many men claim to dislike make-up. By this, of course, they mean recognizable make-up: heavy eye shadow, bold lipsticks, and various forms of sparkle, from the shaved off eyebrows, to the mountain layer of wrong shade of foundation, bloody blush and jammy lipstick – really?

I asked around, and here are some of the looks that the gentlemen dislike when it comes to make-up on a lady:

Neon.

We are not my toddler’s coloring book. Neither are we Nicki Minaj. What’s it with the rainbow-on-face look we see out there sometimes, right?

Blue, oh blue!

How retarded does shiny blue eye shadow look? Especially smacked all there on the eyes,  with all that sparkly stuff. You’re thinking “Did her mirror break?” Yes, same here.  The men too.  Not to say that blue eye shadow is a no-no, but it has to be applied correctly AND sparingly!

Black to goth.

If you are depressed, please do not spread it.  Black liner is good when used with expertise. Why do some feel the need to line black lipstick with black liner and those three ‘beauty spot’ things they draw on their faces – like dimples? Oh shoot me already!

Artsy, artsy.

She may have skipped her art class. Her face is not canvas.  She really must quit the urge to veet her eyebrows off and practice the art of drawing lines upon curves. Please. It is fine, not all of us were gifted with the artsy talent, let us find something better to do.

The fake tan.

You look like an orange. Is that how you really want to go out? An orange. Think about it.

Vampire diaries

Death by blood. Red lipstick is hot ladies, very hot.  You however, must find the correct shade for your skin tone, or else you WILL look like a scene from vampire diaries. Guaranteed.

Pot of clay!

“Was she in a pottery class and the clay landed on her face?” says the voice in our heads.  You know the look? Looks like it is about to crack? Like crack, it is whack.

Here, there, everywhere.

Remember the story of the greedy Hyena who couldn’t choose paths and wanted to go to both directions? Yes it split into two. Moral, do not be greedy. Do one thing at a time, ladies. The general rule is: lips or eyes. Go bold, one feature at a time.

Snow white.

No prince is coming to kiss her out of her sleep looking like Casperthe ghost. Okay?

We got the remedy :

 

 

Runway make-up is not your every day make-up. Understand that these models wear that make-up to depict a character. Television presenters wear make-up for television – you know, studio lights and all. Those actresses in your favorite movie, wear make-up to bring out a particular event – like an accident or a drug junkie. Unless you are one, keep off screen make-up!

Darling, why walk around life playing roles other than your own? A lot of us ladies take the make-up definition by ‘change appearance’ other than the ‘improve appearance’ side of it.

You are pretty; gorgeous, in fact – but other features stand out more than others. IN EVERY WOMAN! Yes, even Halle Berry, Angelina Jolie, et al. Thing is, we need to learn to improve our appearance rather than change it.

I will sing this song till the day we are all singing it together, in unison. Know your skin tone, get professional advice on what make-up tones work for you, choose the right features to highlight, and which to conceal. Here is the thing. If you wear your make-up well, no one will know you are made up. It looks like natural beauty.

Guys  prefer a “natural look” with no make-up. They are probably thinking of, at least, a tinted moisturizer, a little mascara and maybe a dash of color. I’ll just say it once: men don’t “hate” make-up. Men don’t know what make-up looks like. Maybe they don’t like the Tammy Faye Baker look (image)– neither do we!

Now that we have it, and before we get depressed, kindly go wash off that excess on  your face and call us for some good professional make-up advice.

With love,

The SuzieBeauty Family

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2 Comments to “9 make-up looks that men hate.”

  • Very true! Keep it up. Quite hilarious too.

  • I so know of the caked in make-up…in as much as Suzie herself taught me well..its an art and am slowly learning how to be natural…

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